Here we go again! I think I was avoiding writing this post because this is the part of the story where my memory gets a little fuzzy - there were so many little things that happened that were important, but I will try to limit it to the most significant things.
I remember after Horn Creek, I settled in to the new environment of learning and constant fellowship. FFI is like heaven on earth - imagine, waking up in the morning, hanging out with your awesome roommates as you frantically get ready for class, spending all morning learning life changing truth, and in the afternoon either a) spending time in the beautiful outdoors with your friends, or b) working in your internship which is specially tailored to your interests. At night, we usually would go to a community dinner with our professors and their families, or hang out in each others apartments and bring whatever food you had.
Over the weekends, we would spend our time catching up on homework as we sat in a cozy coffee shop, or once again, use our time to explore Colorado. One of the first weekends there, I was able to accompany a group of people up to the top of Pike's Peak (we drove :). Lucky for me, I ended up in the passenger's seat right next to Jake in his Blazer. Two of my roomies were in the back seat. We had a great time going up the mountain on the twisty roads, laughing, telling stories, and sharing our dreams for the future. As we got nearer the summit, Jake's car kept stalling out, which was quite scary because the other car that was following us would zoom around the switch-back and nearly hit us every time - eeek! But obviously, we're okay :) And Jake was so calm through the whole thing. It really impressed me.
Another weekend Jake and I and our friend Teri all went mountain biking together. We had the best time! I was sort of new to mountain biking, and Teri wasn't super confident, but Jake was SO patient with us. He did not try to show-off whatsoever and made it his aim to make sure Teri and I had an awesome time. He was so servant-hearted. But honestly, while we were there, I wasn't thinking about all of this. I was just having the time of my life and enjoying being with awesome people. My heart was still not really considering the option of anything happening between Jake and I, but I knew that I had found an awesome guy friend - a brother in Christ with the same mind. I do remember feeling like I could just be myself around him in a way that I couldn't with other guys.
Tuesday, June 22, 2010
Monday, April 26, 2010
One More Week!
I just wanted to interupt the love story and announce:
I have one week of school left!
althought at times I feel like I will never walk across that stage, I know it will happen:)
Then maybe I will have a little time to plan my wedding?!
:)
I have one week of school left!
althought at times I feel like I will never walk across that stage, I know it will happen:)
Then maybe I will have a little time to plan my wedding?!
:)
Thursday, April 15, 2010
Love Story, Chapter Two
"This is Becky, and she used to have a job where she dressed up as Disney princesses for children's birthday parties..." My roomie and friend Callie was introducing me to all my fellow Alphas in a group get-to-know-you-session. There were two apartment complexes at Focus - the Alphas and the Omegas.
All of us FFI students were enjoying our opening weekend up at Horn Creek Lodge in the Rockies. The weekend was full of fun group activities, snow ball fights, games, testimonies, sharing times, and just relaxation. This was a crucial time - we were all thrown together in this cozy lodge with no one to talk to except each other. I hardley had cell phone service, if I can remember right. I think if you talked to any student, they would say that that first weekend at Horn Creek was very impactful. It set the tone for the rest of the semester.
Later on that morning, after having worshipped as a group, I got up to go to the next session, and ran into Jake - "Hey - I can really see that. I can see how you would have made an awesome Disney princess." He said. "Thanks." Was all I could eek out. "I'm such a doofus!" I thought. "This isn't middle school! Just be chill, Becky!" But I couldn't deny the smile that kept trying to creep onto my face during my next small-group session. "Jake thinks I look like a princess..." I satisfyingly reminicsed...then I tried to snap out of it..."He was just being nice. No big deal. That's just the kind of person he is..." I sighed and resumed listening to the professor who was talking.
Horn Creek was awesome. I was able to engage in some amazing conversations about things that I thought no one else cared about but me. I loved being with people that were so like-minded. I literally felt like God had gathered all the people from around America that were passionate about similar things and put them in one place. It was refreshing, inspiring, and life-giving. I was able to be the most honest with God I had ever been with him in my life as I sat outside of the lodge one morning. I saw the clouds moving over head so fast and said to the Lord, "God, these clouds are moving so fast, and I feel like that is how this semester is going to be. Very fast, with a lot of change at the end. I don't think I'm going to be in the same place after I leave here." That was an accurate statement - I just didn't know at the time how accurate :)
On Sunday, our wonderful time at the Lodge came to a close, and we headed back down to Colorado Springs in a big bus with all of our new-found friends. As Callie and I sat next to each other, we attempted to close the window by the seats we were in. But alas - it would not budge. All of a sudden, two strong arms came over us and slammed that window down like nothing. Of course, you guessed it, it was Jake :) He plopped down in the seat next to Callie and I and the three of us chatted all the way down to Colorado Springs. It was wonderful - but in a different way than I thought. As we talked about dreams for the future, our families, favorite movies, funny moments, etc, I realized that Jake Hatfield, while being handsome, charming, and chivalrous, was also just a really cool guy. In a good way, that conversation made him seem more real to me. He wasn't just this tall, handsome stranger anymore, he was like me - a normal person with intrests, a background, and hopes for the future. My girly nervousness subsided as I relaxed into my chair. "I think we are going to be friends..." I thought to myself...
Baha :D
All of us FFI students were enjoying our opening weekend up at Horn Creek Lodge in the Rockies. The weekend was full of fun group activities, snow ball fights, games, testimonies, sharing times, and just relaxation. This was a crucial time - we were all thrown together in this cozy lodge with no one to talk to except each other. I hardley had cell phone service, if I can remember right. I think if you talked to any student, they would say that that first weekend at Horn Creek was very impactful. It set the tone for the rest of the semester.
Later on that morning, after having worshipped as a group, I got up to go to the next session, and ran into Jake - "Hey - I can really see that. I can see how you would have made an awesome Disney princess." He said. "Thanks." Was all I could eek out. "I'm such a doofus!" I thought. "This isn't middle school! Just be chill, Becky!" But I couldn't deny the smile that kept trying to creep onto my face during my next small-group session. "Jake thinks I look like a princess..." I satisfyingly reminicsed...then I tried to snap out of it..."He was just being nice. No big deal. That's just the kind of person he is..." I sighed and resumed listening to the professor who was talking.
Horn Creek was awesome. I was able to engage in some amazing conversations about things that I thought no one else cared about but me. I loved being with people that were so like-minded. I literally felt like God had gathered all the people from around America that were passionate about similar things and put them in one place. It was refreshing, inspiring, and life-giving. I was able to be the most honest with God I had ever been with him in my life as I sat outside of the lodge one morning. I saw the clouds moving over head so fast and said to the Lord, "God, these clouds are moving so fast, and I feel like that is how this semester is going to be. Very fast, with a lot of change at the end. I don't think I'm going to be in the same place after I leave here." That was an accurate statement - I just didn't know at the time how accurate :)
On Sunday, our wonderful time at the Lodge came to a close, and we headed back down to Colorado Springs in a big bus with all of our new-found friends. As Callie and I sat next to each other, we attempted to close the window by the seats we were in. But alas - it would not budge. All of a sudden, two strong arms came over us and slammed that window down like nothing. Of course, you guessed it, it was Jake :) He plopped down in the seat next to Callie and I and the three of us chatted all the way down to Colorado Springs. It was wonderful - but in a different way than I thought. As we talked about dreams for the future, our families, favorite movies, funny moments, etc, I realized that Jake Hatfield, while being handsome, charming, and chivalrous, was also just a really cool guy. In a good way, that conversation made him seem more real to me. He wasn't just this tall, handsome stranger anymore, he was like me - a normal person with intrests, a background, and hopes for the future. My girly nervousness subsided as I relaxed into my chair. "I think we are going to be friends..." I thought to myself...
Baha :D
Thursday, March 11, 2010
Love Story, Chapter One
I'm getting married to the love of my life, and my best friend, Jake Hatfield :)
As all good love stories go, there is always a back story.
Ever since I got to Bryan College as a Freshman, I had a huge desire to be an R.A. I love mentoring girls, and thought having a hall-full of Freshman girls someday sounded like pure heaven.
So when I was in my second semester of my Sophomore year, I applied. I got through the group interview, and then through the individual interview - and I thought everything went peachy! All my friends were saying "You got this Becky - you'll be a great R.A." All my previous RA's were recommending me, even my professors were throwing in good words for me. You get the picture. I thought I had this one in the bag :)
Then came the day when it was time to find out whether or not you "made it" as an R.A. I went to meet with my RD, and by the look on her face, I knew it was not good. "Becky, I'm sorry, but we did not select you to be an RA." "Ok." I gulped back the tears. I had wanted this so bad! Now my plan of being an RA my Junior and Senior year of college had crumbled. I had no explanation.
One of my friends, Mark Baker, said, "Becky, God must be up to something, because this is just too weird." It was too weird! If everyone I had ever known, trusted, and respected had recommended me for this position, why would it slip through my hands? I had no explanation, and frankly, was a little upset at God for taking this opportunity away from me. But eventually, I was able to surrender it to him and trust that his plan was better. haha - I had no idea!
Because I did not get the RA position, it opened up my Junior year a bit. I had heard some speakers from the Focus on the Family Institute come and speak at Bryan, and was always so moved and impressed. All of a sudden, I kept thinking about the idea of spending a semester at "the Institute." Plus, I have always LOVED Colorado. It sounded like quite the adventure. I felt a need to spend some time away from Bryan and reconnect with God as well. My thought was, "I might not make one friend while I'm there, but if I can just read, soak up information, and just have 'Becky and God' time all semester, I'll be perfectly happy." Once again...I had no idea :)
January 19th, in the Spring of 2009, I find myself in the lobby of the Drury Inn in Colorado Springs, ready for my FFI adventure. As I ate breakfast with my parents, I looked across the room to see a very attractive guy sitting by himself looking out the window to Pike's Peak. "Oh my gosh." I thought to myself. "That guy is so cute. I hope my husband looks like that someday." haha - ironic :) As soon as that thought passed through my mind, he started confidently chatting with the neighboring table: "I'm going to the Focus on the Family Institute!" He said. "Oh my word," I thought. No way. My parents overheard the conversation as well, and encouraged me to go talk to him. "I can't." I just froze. "I'm sure I'll meet him there." I said shakily. "Are you kidding me?" I thought. "THIS guy is going to be in my class?!" All of a sudden, confident Becky was gone.
When I got to my apartment complex that I would be living in all semester, I stepped out to find the same young man ready and waiting to help me with my bags. "Hey! My name's Jake!" He said. "Hey, I'm Becky." I was SO nervous! "What's wrong with me?!" I thought. "Get yourself together!"
To be continued...
As all good love stories go, there is always a back story.
Ever since I got to Bryan College as a Freshman, I had a huge desire to be an R.A. I love mentoring girls, and thought having a hall-full of Freshman girls someday sounded like pure heaven.
So when I was in my second semester of my Sophomore year, I applied. I got through the group interview, and then through the individual interview - and I thought everything went peachy! All my friends were saying "You got this Becky - you'll be a great R.A." All my previous RA's were recommending me, even my professors were throwing in good words for me. You get the picture. I thought I had this one in the bag :)
Then came the day when it was time to find out whether or not you "made it" as an R.A. I went to meet with my RD, and by the look on her face, I knew it was not good. "Becky, I'm sorry, but we did not select you to be an RA." "Ok." I gulped back the tears. I had wanted this so bad! Now my plan of being an RA my Junior and Senior year of college had crumbled. I had no explanation.
One of my friends, Mark Baker, said, "Becky, God must be up to something, because this is just too weird." It was too weird! If everyone I had ever known, trusted, and respected had recommended me for this position, why would it slip through my hands? I had no explanation, and frankly, was a little upset at God for taking this opportunity away from me. But eventually, I was able to surrender it to him and trust that his plan was better. haha - I had no idea!
Because I did not get the RA position, it opened up my Junior year a bit. I had heard some speakers from the Focus on the Family Institute come and speak at Bryan, and was always so moved and impressed. All of a sudden, I kept thinking about the idea of spending a semester at "the Institute." Plus, I have always LOVED Colorado. It sounded like quite the adventure. I felt a need to spend some time away from Bryan and reconnect with God as well. My thought was, "I might not make one friend while I'm there, but if I can just read, soak up information, and just have 'Becky and God' time all semester, I'll be perfectly happy." Once again...I had no idea :)
January 19th, in the Spring of 2009, I find myself in the lobby of the Drury Inn in Colorado Springs, ready for my FFI adventure. As I ate breakfast with my parents, I looked across the room to see a very attractive guy sitting by himself looking out the window to Pike's Peak. "Oh my gosh." I thought to myself. "That guy is so cute. I hope my husband looks like that someday." haha - ironic :) As soon as that thought passed through my mind, he started confidently chatting with the neighboring table: "I'm going to the Focus on the Family Institute!" He said. "Oh my word," I thought. No way. My parents overheard the conversation as well, and encouraged me to go talk to him. "I can't." I just froze. "I'm sure I'll meet him there." I said shakily. "Are you kidding me?" I thought. "THIS guy is going to be in my class?!" All of a sudden, confident Becky was gone.
When I got to my apartment complex that I would be living in all semester, I stepped out to find the same young man ready and waiting to help me with my bags. "Hey! My name's Jake!" He said. "Hey, I'm Becky." I was SO nervous! "What's wrong with me?!" I thought. "Get yourself together!"
To be continued...
Sunday, November 22, 2009
Walking with Hands Held Open
Elisabeth Elliot wrote:
"It was manifest that the anxiety that shadowed too many of my days was that I should miss the path of righteousness. Better that anxiety, perhaps, than a cavalier carelessness, but the years since have proved to me over and over again that the heart set to do the Father's will need never fear defeat. His promises of guidance may be fully counted upon. Does it make sense to believe that the Shepherd would care less about getting his sheep where He wants them to go than they care about getting there?"
Something that I've been intentionally trying to do this past week is to remember to walk with my hands held open - meaning, walking through my days in a posture of surrender. This life is not my own; it was given to me as a gift from my Father. Every good thing he gives me, I want to offer right back up to Him. This story of David is a perfect example of this:
2 Samuel 23
13 During harvest time, three of the thirty chief men came down to David at the cave of Adullam, while a band of Philistines was encamped in the Valley of Rephaim. 14 At that time David was in the stronghold, and the Philistine garrison was at Bethlehem. 15 David longed for water and said, "Oh, that someone would get me a drink of water from the well near the gate of Bethlehem!" 16 So the three mighty men broke through the Philistine lines, drew water from the well near the gate of Bethlehem and carried it back to David. But he refused to drink it; instead, he poured it out before the LORD. 17 "Far be it from me, O LORD, to do this!" he said. "Is it not the blood of men who went at the risk of their lives?" And David would not drink it.
Such were the exploits of the three mighty men.
I always get moved to tears whenever I read this story. David is seen as an enemy in the very place he called home. He probably used to drink water from the well by the gate when he was a young boy growing up in Bethlehem. All he wanted was a small taste of the comforts of home. His mighty men, being the best kinds of friends a man could ask for, risked their lives to get some for him. But David sets an example for all future generations of what it means to walk through life with hands held open - and pours out the water as an offering to God. He gives back the very thing that would provide him with so much joy and comfort, trusting that God would provide for all his needs. How beautiful.
As I walk through this transitional time in life, it is easy, in my desire for stability, to grab a hold of something - anything - and act likes its mine to manipulate, enjoy, and cherish, instead of offering it back up to my Savior. I hope and desire and pray that my heart's posture would mirror that of David, and ultimately, Jesus, who prayed, "not my will, but yours be done."
"It was manifest that the anxiety that shadowed too many of my days was that I should miss the path of righteousness. Better that anxiety, perhaps, than a cavalier carelessness, but the years since have proved to me over and over again that the heart set to do the Father's will need never fear defeat. His promises of guidance may be fully counted upon. Does it make sense to believe that the Shepherd would care less about getting his sheep where He wants them to go than they care about getting there?"
Something that I've been intentionally trying to do this past week is to remember to walk with my hands held open - meaning, walking through my days in a posture of surrender. This life is not my own; it was given to me as a gift from my Father. Every good thing he gives me, I want to offer right back up to Him. This story of David is a perfect example of this:
2 Samuel 23
13 During harvest time, three of the thirty chief men came down to David at the cave of Adullam, while a band of Philistines was encamped in the Valley of Rephaim. 14 At that time David was in the stronghold, and the Philistine garrison was at Bethlehem. 15 David longed for water and said, "Oh, that someone would get me a drink of water from the well near the gate of Bethlehem!" 16 So the three mighty men broke through the Philistine lines, drew water from the well near the gate of Bethlehem and carried it back to David. But he refused to drink it; instead, he poured it out before the LORD. 17 "Far be it from me, O LORD, to do this!" he said. "Is it not the blood of men who went at the risk of their lives?" And David would not drink it.
Such were the exploits of the three mighty men.
I always get moved to tears whenever I read this story. David is seen as an enemy in the very place he called home. He probably used to drink water from the well by the gate when he was a young boy growing up in Bethlehem. All he wanted was a small taste of the comforts of home. His mighty men, being the best kinds of friends a man could ask for, risked their lives to get some for him. But David sets an example for all future generations of what it means to walk through life with hands held open - and pours out the water as an offering to God. He gives back the very thing that would provide him with so much joy and comfort, trusting that God would provide for all his needs. How beautiful.
As I walk through this transitional time in life, it is easy, in my desire for stability, to grab a hold of something - anything - and act likes its mine to manipulate, enjoy, and cherish, instead of offering it back up to my Savior. I hope and desire and pray that my heart's posture would mirror that of David, and ultimately, Jesus, who prayed, "not my will, but yours be done."
Thursday, November 12, 2009
Changes...
Well...seeing it's been way too long since I've written on my blog, I figure a little update is in order:
I am back at school in Tennessee and the last of the autumn leaves are falling off the branches. It's such a wonderful time to be here - Bryan is in a valley so on either side the hills are just on fire and it is so beautiful. But as with every season - change must come, and I feel the tug of winter's wind as I walk outside now. Pretty soon all the leaves will be gone, which will usher in one of my favorite times of the year - Christmas time!
The semester only has five more weeks left in it and crunch time is upon me (funny how I'm writing in my blog during crunch time...) papers, projects, and final assignments are piling up, but I'm managing to keep my head above water :)
I am looking intensely toward the future right now - I'm graduating in May of 2010!!! I've been really wrestling with what it means to know the will of God and how to walk in obedience - especially when there are big decisions ahead with no clear direction in sight.
Someone who has been such an encourager and such an amazing blessing in my life during this time is my boyfriend, Jake. I met him last semester at the Focus on the Family Institute - and can I just say, most amazing young man I've ever met. His heart is so hard after God, he's such an encourager, and he really pushes me to ask the hard questions as I journey through this transitional year. I am so thankful for the blessing he is in my life.
Jake and Me :)
I am so thankful that our God is faithful when we are so faithless. My heart desires intimacy with my King, but so often I fall short of seeking Him with the passion that I desire to. I want my life to be a continual journey of knowing Him and being transformed into his image. Life is so good - and such an adventure.
Monday, July 20, 2009
Artwork!
Remember this picture?
When I was at Focus, I had a favorite Starbucks I would go to that had a fantastic view of the Rocky Mountains. It's where I would go to journal, read, think, or hang out with friends. This particular Starbucks showcased a lot of local artists' work, including the picture below. I loved it so much for it's simplicity and the colors, so I took a picture of it and posted it on this blog.
Fast-forward to the end of the semester: I decided to buy a canvas to create a piece of artwork that encapsulated my time at Focus. I was hoping to make the piece artwork before I left FFI, but things just got too busy. So here I am, at home, the summer's coming to an end, and I realize I still have a blank canvas.
As I was trying to think of what my inspiration should be for my artwork, my mind went back to the painting in Starbucks. And I went from there!
The original had words that had little meaning to me, so while the picture is very similar to the original, the words are my own. The first picture is the original in Starbucks, and the last is my finished product!
At Focus, we learned that God is Truth - he is Ultimate Reality. He is the source of life - everything in this world springs from Him. If we have our roots firmly established in Truth, then we can obey Jesus' command in John 15:6 to "go and bear fruit." My time at Focus was very equipping, and now this picture will always remind me to take what I've learned, the Truth that I've gained, and go and bear fruit. While at the same time reminding me of my beloved Colorado Springs Starbucks :)
It's been a while since I've created art like this, so I see a lot of room for improvement. But now that I've gotten back into it, I'm inspired to do more.
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